Steve Harvey’s book “Act like a Lady, Think like a Man” gave women all over the world information on every type of man in every form. When you look at the news you see our black men stealing, killing, fighting, etc. It does something to all of us, especially our black women. On the honest tip I love a black man. I love the strength, swag (confidence), features, creativity, and many more attributes. What makes me very angry is the mentality that someone or the world owes you. Nobody owes you ANYTHING!! We all have to get out there and work our tails off to get what we have.
I understand everyone isn’t dealt a good hand in life. This is where you prove everyone around you wrong. I think about what Cicely Tyson said on Oprah’s Life class “make it worth their while.” If anyone going is to bring a child into this world, make it worth their stay on this earth. When she said that something hit me in the spirit, that made me scream at almost one in the morning.
The Bible states that he looked down into forty-two generations to find a virgin to bring Jesus to this earth. He sent an angel to let her know that she was chosen to bring Jesus into this earth. The angel also informed Mary of her challenges. The Heavenly Father will take care of her. What made it worth her while was she got to see and feel her son again.
I want to say to the parents who are doing your best, Thank you and keep up the good work. Next, to those that can do better stand up to the challenge, the Bible states much is given, much is required. If you want the best it takes doing your best. One of those steps is getting an education or vocation, etc. It is making the effort to be your children’s example. Making it worth their while is taking them on the field trips of life’s path, letting them meet people who have completed their dreams. It doesn’t happen overnight but it can happen.
I say to our black men the stereotyping isn’t going to stop overnight but we have to fight back with knowledge. When the elderly or someone older with wisdom and knowledge tells you something to help you, accept it and show appreciation. They made it through the Civil Rights, the Jim Crow Laws, etc so that we could have what we have today. That is equality!!! I think about the history classes I have taken. The Vietnam War was senseless but what made it worse was our black men and women couldn’t vote. We fought in a war that wasn’t our concern.
Now we are fighting a war that is our concern. We have to fight it with prayer, knowledge, with reasonable expression and protesting. We have been lacking in these areas in the Michael Brown case. In Trayvon Martin’s case all the above was done effectively. We need our men to express their emotions. Expressing emotions doesn’t make you weak. I have heard so many times from our men, especially black men, that I am mad or angry because they disrespected me. They can’t articulate how? The how is more important than you know because like I said before this is where the knowledge kicks in.
The Bible states that people perish for the lack of knowledge. This is so true. If you look at our prison population it is majority black men. If you look at Chicago, New York, Kinston, North Carolina or any other city. Black on black crimes is a norm. Yes, a norm!! We don’t understand why we can fight, cuss, fuss, yell and destroy other people property over Michael Brown. My best friend asked me why our black community won’t rally or protest for black on black crimes?
Pause. Hold on. That is a powerful statement; I had to scream when she said that because it is so true. Where are the people? Where are the real men? Why are you afraid of this young man or boy? You might be answering ‘he might got a gun’. Yes, at the end of the day you’d rather save this black man child from being another stat in the national research database. If they see you care, the love will come. When the love come the trust and respect follow. You have to take a stand somewhere.
Now you see a little ray of hope in that aspect but they don’t know how to handle life challenges. The line they use is “they keep holding me back.” Nobody is holding you back except the person in the mirror - This is another form of slavery.
Our black people have made people angry because it wasn’t easy but we fought to break the barriers. You can’t expand your mind to be that Denzel Washington, Tyrese, NeYo, Beyonce`, Tyler Perry or anyone else in your community that you admire. It is time to take responsibility for your own actions. If you had those six or seven kids, you feel your life is over. Don’t use the system to make a life. Make a life and be an example. Like I said before much is given, much is required. Let’s break the chains!
I can go on and on about the issues of our black men and women. I touched on the issues that were near and dear to me. I am a black woman who is in her early thirty’s. I had every different form of a black man. Black men respect us!! Young women respect yourself, you don’t have to have a man to validate who you are as woman. If he isn’t a real man, then he is just another bill. Yes, another bill that don’t have to be added to your life. Please stop having kids and not taking care of these kids. The grandparents should be able to enjoy what they have worked for in life. Children need love and attention. The mentality as long as the child isn’t bothering me is not cutting it. It is embarrassing to see your child doesn’t know how to sit down in a restaurant, doctor’s office, or read, etc. I am a single mother of a seven year old girl. I have had people to watch our table in amazement. After they finished their meal, they came to the table and complimented on how well mannered she is. I know single parents with five or more children who maintain to work, go to school, and manage a career. Most of all, the children know how to behave. Yes, it takes help from others who are willing to help you- not hinder you. If you have setbacks don’t give up. The race isn’t given to the swift or the strong but to those who endure until the end. All that matters is that you finish!
We have some races to run. All I know is I am ready to run them to save my black men and women. If that is through sharing my knowledge, wisdom, and understanding, then I am here. You can not win the race if you don’t have your finish line set in your mind. I am not talking about the quick money, like selling drugs. That is a life in prison or death. This race comes from the reward of hard work, education, buying a house, having your own business (legal), a great career; these are the rewards that are waiting. You have to finish the race to receive the reward.